Archive for July, 2012

I have been gone for a long time… and I’m so sorry! but my life has been a roller coaster and I’m doing my best to keep up! I’m going to be putting up pieces of my own personal Diary for a while to share with you what I’ve learned/ what I am learning. Be blessed!



The words ‘you are worth it’ are easily said,

But not as easily me


The idea that she has the beauty of a queen is a wonderful thing,

But what does that even mean?

Looks are deceiving.

Beauty is fleeting.

And the enemy likes to cover our mirrors with rose colored glass

That doesn’t allow us to look past our past!

The weight in our hearts is heavier than the weight on our bodies,

Due to the fact that this weight is suffocating.

We cut and starve ourselves

Legislating a government within ourselves that is officially degrading

And horribly perpetrating.

If only she could see past the rose colored glass

And feel the love which defies all the things

That won’t last…


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Just another small entry I made a while back and thought someone might enjoy (:

Feb. 14


God is our savior. He saves/saved us. However if someone saved you would you just say ‘thanks’ and walk away? Then next time you needed saving call them up? Not bothering to build any other sort of relationship with them? Probably not…

But we seem to only remember God when we are in trouble, then don’t bother ‘calling’ him up when we are doing just fine. Or we get tired and we try to use our own strength to get through it. We believe somehow we will grow stronger by doing that. Yet we only grow stronger by following God.

We think we are better off alone, then at breaking point we scream out for God to rescue us… like He only lives to save us. God doesn’t just want to save us; He wants to keep us safe.  And in order to do this, we must have a real, active relationship with Him.


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Every relationship should be founded on your relationship with God.  But what if that relationship is fake? Here is what I’m saying-

Jason is a very nice young man. He goes to church and is very active with his youth group. But his relationship with God is always based on his other relations.  He is more going through the motions. Then he meets Haley. Suddenly God is his best friend, they are constantly talking, and Jason is always mentioning God. Why? Haley is a strong Christian. He wants to impress her. Or maybe it’s both ways and Haley is doing the same thing. But here’s what happens when their relationship gets closer or fades; their ‘relationship’ with God also dies. It benefits only them for that short and pressed amount of time. This could also happen to anyone who wants to be noticed for their good works.

Here is the thing. Your relationship with God is all you got. Without God your life would shrivel away like a flower that only sat in the sun to look attractive but never drank the life giving stream that flowed next to it. Period. All your relationships that were founded on a false character will also fade away. An open heart to the truth, whether you’re a strong Christian or not, is what’s going to get you a bona fide friendship. But the camaraderie I more so want to talk about is the deepest one you could possibly have, that’s your relationship with God.

So tell me, why are you a Christian? Is it for the glitzy show? Is it for the reason that people look up to you when they think you have strong faith? I’ve done that. ‘Being persecuted for Christ’, sounds valiant right? Being strong while people try to thrash you, which is heroic, but holding a fake relationship to seem that way isn’t. God isn’t going to truly let you make a difference because he recognizes what is in your heart. Would you rather make people and friends think you know God to look mature or would you rather really know Him? Because I don’t believe God is pleased with all this fake crap we are dishing out.

There is a huge difference in knowing and believing something in your head and then knowing and believing something in your heart.  That is the whole difference between the fake relationship and the real one.  In the fake one you know and believe it in your head, but it doesn’t go past there. You ‘know’ why you go to church and you ‘believe’ in God, but that’s not what he wants. He wants your heart and soul in your relationship!

“I’m praying for you”- how many people have heard this or said it? I’m pretty sure everyone has. It’s comforting. At times that’s all I want to hear because if I share an issue with someone an issue in my life, they honestly can’t do anything about it. Only God can. Sure friends are there to support you, but in a real issue God is the only answer. But how would you feel if a person told you that and then never thought twice about actually praying for you? The words were hollow and worthless then, that doesn’t feel very comforting anymore.  So we have all heard it been said, but how many of us have said it and meant it?

So when you’re faking your relationship with God and praying for someone you’re just going through the motions. It’s like this, you know God can help them, but it’s not really in your head or heart to pray. You want the praise you will get for being a good Christian friend. It’s like a man who says he is a doctor. He has the clothes, tools, books, and he knows the whole big shebang to being a doctor, but he has only the brain knowledge. He just wants the cool title of Doctor, but by this time next year he probably will want some other title he has dubbed as ‘cool’. Unless we completely give our heart and soul in our relationship with God, then that’s what’s going to happen to us also. The good Christian title won’t seem cool for long and we will try to pick up a new one. Our relationship with God will be stale again and we will end up crusty and broken.

Now there are going to be times in any relationship were it seems grey or it’s just drained. Physically and emotionally we, as humans, can be unstable. But if your relationship with our Father is real, then it is only a matter of time before God will sail in and bring a refreshing spray to your relationship.  But I think we need to examine our hearts and ask: Why am I a Christian? And why am I in this relationship with Him? Because your age, time, or place in life doesn’t matter. Your relationship with God comes first in your life and it starts with knowing where you two actually stand.


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Part 2

“Here’s another way to put it: You’re here to be light, bringing out the God-colors in the world. God is not a secret to be kept. We’re going public with this, as public as a city on a hill. If I make you light-bearers, you don’t think I’m going to hide you under a bucket, do you? I’m putting you on a light stand. Now that I’ve put you there on a hilltop, on a light stand—shine! Keep open house; be generous with your lives. By opening up to others, you’ll prompt people to open up with God, this generous Father in heaven.
Matthew 5:13-15


As a Christian we are examples. We are how people view God Himself. We are modeling what the Bible says. A non-Christian isn’t going to look at someone who says ‘I am a Christian,’ and think ‘they are lying.’ No, they are going to think ‘oh, so that’s what a Christian is?’ and no matter how that person behaves it designs the viewer’s ideas and feelings towards Christians in a whole.

So at this point it could go either way. That person could a great example of a Christian or he could’ve been a hypocrite. See, we have a vital role of showing our friends and family God’s love and the wonderful relationship you can have with Him. But if our lives do not match God’s love and purpose, then we are hypocrites slaughtering God’s name.

Don’t fool yourself into thinking that you are a listener when you are anything but, letting the Word go in one ear and out the other. Act on what you hear! Those who hear and don’t act are like those who glance in the mirror, walk away, and two minutes later have no idea who they are, what they look like.
James 1:21-23


We shouldn’t just listen to the sermons and read the Bible, we should be living it. We find it so easy to be typically ‘good’ people, but when it comes to going beyond our comfort zones and into the ‘oh look at that goody-two shoes’ we find ourselves buckling under what other people think of us far too much. Or we start to think ‘I can’t really do that… it’s just beyond me…’

However, when He, the Spirit of truth, has come, He will guide you into all truth; for He will not speak on His own authority, but whatever He hears He will speak; and He will tell you things to come.
John 16:12-14

So I say, let the Holy Spirit guide your lives. Then you won’t be doing what your sinful nature craves.
Galatians 5:15-17

By listening to listening to the Holy Spirit we are guided by how to conduct ourselves in times of trials. He is our teacher and guide to get us through whatever we need. When we say ‘it’s too hard for me to do,’ He says ‘Jesus already did the hard part for you.’

Once we know what is right and wrong and where we should be setting our standards… what’s next? Well carrying them out! (Standards, boundaries, laws, etc… change for guys and girls therefore I will not go into all of them, but they are all clearly stated in the Bible. If you’re unsure of them and want to know more is sure to email me or ask a trusted Godly person in your life)

Remember our first verse:

“Here’s another way to put it: You’re here to be light, bringing out the God-colors in the world. God is not a secret to be kept. We’re going public with this, as public as a city on a hill. If I make you light-bearers, you don’t think I’m going to hide you under a bucket, do you? I’m putting you on a light stand. Now that I’ve put you there on a hilltop, on a light stand—shine! Keep open house; be generous with your lives. By opening up to others, you’ll prompt people to open up with God, this generous Father in heaven.
Matthew 5:13-15

We are not simple carrying them out because it’s ‘The Law’. It says in

Luke 6:45

New International Version (NIV)

45 a good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and an evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of.”

When the heart is full… full of what? Whatever you placed there. When we are honoring God and seeking an active relationship with Him, our actions and lifestyle will be the reflection of that.  We will automatically be the ‘city on a hill’ a ‘light in the darkness’. And the best part is, it will be natural. You won’t be fighting to convince yourself you need to keep more biblical standards and rules. It will be a blessing to be following God more fully, something your heart will be craving to do. The way you view God’s laws is a direct reflection on how actively you are pursuing a relationship with Him.

So don’t be the Christian who’s ashamed or too lazy to walk out their faith in everything they do. Be the Christian proves the Love of God is real with everything they do.

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Christians talk about rising above normal culture and into holy living. Holy literally means ‘set apart’; we are to be set apart from the average human and live to glorify our maker. But one of the biggest issues with today’s Christians teens in that we don’t know what or how to do that. We assume going to church and being a nice person is enough and that makes us a good Christian. Right? Wrong.

Terms and labels don’t define us; we define our terms and labels.

Let’s take Jesus as an example. He was the Son of God, the perfect man. But that was not just something someone labeled Him, He didn’t just say ‘this is what I am’ his life said it. In that time period a ‘good’ Christian was labeled as someone who obeyed the priests, went to all the services and took part in the rituals. They didn’t hang out with ‘sinners’ nor did they make friends with Gentiles or Samaritans. They tried to make a set of standards and boundaries that qualified them as Christians. But that just isn’t possible.

Why? Because they were man-made rules and religion and Jesus defied them.

Did He do it out of resentment? No.

Here’s the point:

You cannot make yourself anymore of a Christian than you already are.

Even when we were dead (slain) by [our own] shortcomings and trespasses, He made us alive together in fellowship and in union with Christ; [He gave us the very life of Christ Himself, the same new life with which He quickened Him, for] it is by grace (His favor and mercy which you did not deserve) that you are saved ( delivered from judgment and made partakers of Christ’s salvation).
Ephesians 2:4-6

See, we cannot save ourselves, that is why Jesus came, so what makes us think that we can become ‘more of’ a Christian than we already are? If we can’t earn our salvation and we can’t become more than we already are… why do we even try to ‘do hard things’? Why do we set ourselves apart from everyone else and set higher standards then there already are? Why shouldn’t being a ‘good person’ good enough for us?

To understand this we must first understand WHO WE ARE.

John 3:3-5

The Message (MSG)

 3Jesus said, “You’re absolutely right. Take it from me: Unless a person is born from above, it’s not possible to see what I’m pointing to—to God’s kingdom.”

 4“How can anyone,” said Nicodemus, “be born who has already been born and grown up? You can’t re-enter your mother’s womb and be born again. What are you saying with this ‘born-from-above’ talk?”

 5-6Jesus said, “You’re not listening. Let me say it again. Unless a person submits to this original creation—the ‘wind-hovering-over-the-water’ creation, the invisible moving the visible, a baptism into a new life—it’s not possible to enter God’s kingdom. When you look at a baby, it’s just that: a body you can look at and touch. But the person who takes shape within is formed by something you can’t see and touch—the Spirit—and becomes a living spirit.

Once we asked Jesus to come into our hearts and we are saved. We are made new. All of our old stains and past in washed away from God’s book and we are now His children.

Romans 5

 1-2By entering through faith into what God has always wanted to do for us—set us right with him, make us fit for him—we have it all together with God because of our Master Jesus. And that’s not all: We throw open our doors to God and discover at the same moment that he has already thrown open his door to us. We find ourselves standing where we always hoped we might stand—out in the wide open spaces of God’s grace and glory, standing tall and shouting our praise.

 3-5There’s more to come: We continue to shout our praise even when we’re hemmed in with troubles, because we know how troubles can develop passionate patience in us, and how that patience in turn forges the tempered steel of virtue, keeping us alert for whatever God will do next. In alert expectancy such as this, we’re never left feeling shortchanged. Quite the contrary—we can’t round up enough containers to hold everything God generously pours into our lives through the Holy Spirit!

 6-8Christ arrives right on time to make this happen. He didn’t, and doesn’t, wait for us to get ready. He presented himself for this sacrificial death when we were far too weak and rebellious to do anything to get ourselves ready. And even if we hadn’t been so weak, we wouldn’t have known what to do anyway. We can understand someone dying for a person worth dying for, and we can understand how someone good and noble could inspire us to selfless sacrifice. But God put his love on the line for us by offering his Son in sacrificial death while we were of no use whatever to him.

 9-11Now that we are set right with God by means of this sacrificial death, the consummate blood sacrifice, there is no longer a question of being at odds with God in any way. If, when we were at our worst, we were put on friendly terms with God by the sacrificial death of his Son, now that we’re at our best, just think of how our lives will expand and deepen by means of his resurrection life! Now that we have actually received this amazing friendship with God, we are no longer content to simply say it in plodding prose. We sing and shout our praises to God through Jesus, the Messiah!

So now that we are His children, we have a calling.

In Revelation 5 they say this about Jesus:

“Paying in blood, you bought men and women,
Bought them back from all over the earth,
Bought them back for God.
Then you made them a Kingdom, Priests for our God,
Priest-kings to rule over the earth.”

Remember. We were once perfect. We were created in the image of God Himself. You know how the Romans thought their leaders held the blood of the gods in their veins? Half human, half god? Well, in one sense they were right. They just didn’t know who God was.

Adam and Eve sinned we lost that, but Jesus came and got it back for us. Now we are serving Him and he has appointed us to be Priests for our God, Priest-kings to rule over the earth. By becoming his children we literally accept this. It’s a blessing, pretty awesome if you think about it, but it is also a challenge.

How do we ‘rule over the earth’?

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“His laws are before me;

I have not turned away from his decrees.

I have been blameless before Him and have kept myself from sin.

The Lord has rewarded me according to my righteousness,

According to my cleanness in His sight.”

-2 Samuel 22:23-25

All of 2 Samuel 22 is praise King David wrote about his relationship with God. It goes on and on about how much God loves and helps him and all his children. And it shocked me that David felt free to say some of the things he said. Aka the part I just posted. Why? Because, just a few chapters earlier he committed adultery and murder. So how could he say that he was blameless? And he was going to get rewarded! (Read the whole story if you haven’t because God rewarded him significantly) ‘His laws are before me, and I have not turned away from his decree,’? Nonsense! At least, that was my first reaction…

At a second look I realized something. David was blameless. He was a man after God’s own heart. But how? Simple. First off, David repented of everything he did (2 Samuel 12:13). In Hebrew ‘repent’ means to turn away from. So every time he fell short, he would repent and turn back around to God. He never let his mistakes overtake is relationship with God.

David was human and as a human his flesh would be at constant battle with his heart. He probably struggled more than we know with sin; everyone has their own private battles with it every day. And one day, David gave in. he slept with a married woman. He murdered someone. He sinned. Then he actually waited till God finally sent a prophet down to the palace before owning up to his mistake and repenting. So now we are at the point where we are like, ‘okay, ya. God forgives. Big deal.’

But look at it this way, we have all sinned and fallen into so many ditches it’s sometimes hard to see the light.

We say we are going to change and then, a week later, we do the exact thing we promised not to. We hear the words ‘God forgives’ but honesty, after a while, they are meaningless. Why? Because we have heard them SO many times! Its like ‘okay, I agree, he does. But not for me. Not anymore.’

Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today, and forever.
Hebrews 13:7-9

The beauty of this verse is that it means, no matter what we do, how long we wait, what goes on in the middle, once we seek our God again. He is the same. He isn’t going to change His mind or take back what He once said.

So even though we fall. we can get back up. and even though we’ve turned away. We can come back and still have a Heart after God’s own Heart. Just like David.

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Sorry I have not posted anything in a while! Been super busy and haven’t had much time to write… but I have constantly been keeping up my diary and decided to share a few things from it that I think you might enjoy (: Just some of my thoughts from early in the mornings.

Mar. 29

Last night I had a talk about how girls’ focus on having the ‘perfect’ image and how it tears us apart inside. It’s a very soft topic for me, my heart aches for the girls who think that she will only be considered pretty by her outward looks.

Beauty is from the inside out. Some of the most beautiful people i know are not a size 0 or 1; their face isn’t like those photoshopped to perfection on magazine covers. Instead, they traded that size zero in the waist for a huge heart. And while their faces may not be ‘perfectly’ shaped, they are perfectly beautiful.

Why? Because they are able to glow with the undying passion for God and smile from the inside charm that sees people with the eyes of the heart, rather than head.

The biggest lie I think girls get trapped in is that they are not beautiful. But who has the right to say that when no human is actually perfect?

God can judge beauty, because He created beauty.

If we are to follow in His footsteps; then we must obtain the Lord’s scale of beauty and throw away the worlds.


“Charm is deceptive, and outward beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord and walks in His way is to be praised.” –Proverbs 31:30


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